u/BunniLuvs2Read

Blondie had a traumatic childhood and has the ability to bring the dead back to life. She creates a grotesque family unit and sees herself as its “patriarch”. She kidnaps the dark haired girl (who resembles Blondies mom) and makes her the wife/mother of the family.

I (unfortunately) like men, but there’s something about mean bossy women that make me into a stuttering mess. Anyways here’s what I made for thanksgiving 100 years ago. Please do not degrade my culinary skills because I will like it.

Biscuit Buttery Buns hates my boyfriend Mike and men in general. Whenever Mike comes over after his long shift at the cock and balls crushing factory Biscuit will growl and bark at him. Mike gets so annoyed he leaves and runs over my mailbox (this is the 7th time he’s done that ). I once caught Mike on all fours growling at biscuit and barking at him. Biscuit was doing the same thing until I grabbed a bottle of windex and sprayed Mike with it. He got so mad that I chose biscuit over him that he pounced right through my window and ran over my mailbox again.

How do I explain to biscuit that Mike will make a good father??? The boy is out of control and needs a male figure in his life. He’s already ran off 10 potential suitors!!!