Egy baráti beszélgetésből kanyarodott ez ki.

Nemektől független, ha van valaki, akit (direkt így kifejezve) “basznál”, de az ember stílusa és megnyilvánulása hosszú távon neked kimerítő, akkor megtartod a személyt egy beszélgetőpartnernek? (És nem zárod le a dolgot, ergo se veled-se nélküled progi fut)

Asking as a diagnosed NPD person.

Why would you (not) use the subtypes?

What ones would you use?

Hey, I have many PDs

I have a problem with emotional intelligence, my empathy is low.

Whenever I hear people explain their problems, I get why they say it and why it’s a problem to THEM, but to me, it feels so smaller

To the point that it pisses me off and makes me bad about myself

Like, when people tell me that they feel bad while they have so cool parents (it’s a legit example)

Then I just sit there:
- K, so you have a problem that is a problem to you, but to me it’s not, and you even have lovable parents which I not. FUCK THIS

I know that I am the A-hole in this, and tbh, I feel so… “bad” that such OPPORTUNITIES, like a group therapy does the opposite for me

(This was a DBT therapy group, but it really did the opposite for me)

What could help on this? Can I train myself to have higher EQ? I genuenly do not have friends, because I cannot empathise and it makes me devalue their stuff.

But on the other hand, it does bother me, since I am able to understand this.

It’s just sooo fucked, and I feel… ashamed… in a sense.

Can you relate?

Group therapies genuenly annoy me so much

Since I cannot empathise and have low emotional intelligence, other people’s problems annoy me

I often think their problems are such nothings or minimal.

I do see people with problems I relate to and understand, but often times they piss me off so much!!!

And tbh, group therapies are rather getting on my nerves.

When we get to a serious topic, we cannot discuss it, since it’s “not universal”

Did you feel this?

I have a mixed disorder, one of them is BPD

I often find myself to be REALLY attached to someone, and I am obsessive - This is probably the FP many people mention

I want to talk with them every day, and the idea of losing them makes me fucked

I am anxious wether or not I lose them

Or if I fuck up stuff

Or I made a mistake

And it gets so bad that when they feel upset, I feel suicidal that I am responsible for it, so “I am a bad partner, no wonder we won’t happen”

Its SO shit

I NEED HELP. I even have this rn, and I cannot sleep, my thougts are everywhere, physically I am fucked, my heart is racing…

What helps for you???

Any platform counts. By NPD creator, I mean DIAGNOSED NPD person

So, here’s the thing

I have low emotional intelligence

I easily snap

And I also have a Paranoid PD, so making up false stories is basically a profession (for example: “they are just using me, against me, they are cheating on me”)

Aaaaaand I can be punishing. I do not care that they feel bad. I feel regulated when I made my punishment. But after that, I just forget what I did in a sense, and I have 0 remorse

Can you train yourself to have remorse? I literally never stop with the shitty behaviour, and It’s REALLY bad

Hey, so I have a bit of a problem

I cannot keep friendships, because I genuenly doesn’t care about people or their interests

I am interested in their problems (pls, do not make this about manipulation), BECAUSE I am able to understand their way of thinking, their wounds and stuff like these

I have low empathy. But, when a problem is discussed, my cognitive empathy is there very much, while emotionally I feel uncomfortable or nothing.

This kind of “being able to understand” makes me useful, so I prefer the “deep” topics, because it’s something I can relate to.

Apart from that, I really do not care about people. Like their hobbies, shows, their fan stuff, sports - I just… don’t

BUT, WHAT I HATE:

—> When someone is really close to my heart (friendship, or love interest, but mainly love interests), and for just some reason I care for them, I just get….

…too…. Dependent…. And I care a lot

But, what’s worse, is how much I am impacted by them. I FUCKING HATE THAT

So, I am either not giving a damn, or I am overly influenced/impacted by them

—> My main problem here is that I DO NOT like the fact that I am impacted. I hate to admit it, and it makes me mad and frustrated

Do you relate to any of this? How do you treat this? Any thoughts?

Hey, pwOCPD here.

I often refuse to admit one feeling of mine, since it’s usually evoked by someone/something else (it’s still my feeling and a “me problem), but I HATE the idea that I can be affected by an outside “force”.

Idk if you can relate, but I feel like I lose my autonomy. And it makes me angry at the person-thing, that it CAN affect me while I do NOT want to be affected.

Do you have this?
How do you cope?
What could be a healthy mindset for this?

Hey, pwNPD here.

I am attending an emotions-based group therapy, and I realised stuff.

I often refuse to admit one feeling of mine, since it’s usually evoked by someone/something else (it’s still my feeling and a “me problem), but I HATE the idea that I can be affected by an outside “force”.

Idk if you can relate, but I feel like I lose my autonomy. And it makes me angry at the person-thing, that it CAN affect me while I do NOT want to be affected.

Do you have this?

Many NPDs can have ASPD too.

In this sub, there are people asking if they are narcs, and the terms are misused

But I’m curious about the ASPD guys:
- What do you think?
- What are your stereotypes?
- What do you think when you see self-proclaimed world dominators?
- How do you feel about these?

Hello there!

I post a lot on this sub, and I am a diagnosed NPD.

As an active user on this subreddit, I noticed that many non-NPD people is present here - which is somewhat cool!

BUT:

- I noticed that the newcommers tend to use pop-psychology terms about NPD

- and mainly, people are probably not aware that the pop-psychology terms are misrepresenting, and can be hurtfull to NPDs.

I would like to suggest that:

- We should make introduction content for non-NPDs too. As to minimalize possible conflicts, and also educate people. NPDs suffer from mischaracterization, and us NPDs can do the job to turn this around (just like BPDs started speaking out!)

Furthermore, I would also suggest that during a post, we should state if we speak as pwNPD, or non-NPD.

Please, share your opinions, regardless of being NPD, or non-NPD!

I often see the “flying monkies” and DARVO brought up against NPDs. (i’m a diagnosed Npd)

I have no idea about the actual usage of “flying monkies).

For DARVO, I see the idea, but I think’s its a negative package of projective identification

What do you think?

Hey. I am a diagnosed OCPD (recently).

I am interested about the loved one’s perspective:
- What’s hurtful to you that an OCPD person probably doesn’t notice?

Hey. I am diagnosed with Ocpd (only recently), and I want to understand my PD.

What are some stuff that are natural to you, but it’s actually the PD itself?

What are the acts you think of as natural, but others commented on them being a bit much?

Hey. I am somewhat interested about learning the basics of some religions. I got into a community where we have a lot of Christians, and while my upbringing did not have any religion, I am a bit interested.

But still, I have a weird moral feeling;

- Is it “okay” to learn about religions while having a PD?
- Isn’t this some “exploitation” of God? For some reason I feel like I would “use” religion as some coping, and it would not be about the religion, but to cope with my PDs.

I am in therapy with a clinical psychologist. I also take medication. And I am interested about learning the basics, but still, I don’t want to ‘use’ a religion. Maybe my perspective is narrow.

What are your thoughts? Do you have any connections with any religion? Do you incorporate it into your therapy process?

Thanks for the replies - this is a bit different, but I am interested in the narratives

Idk what is this, but I dissociate after intense emotions

When I feel agressive, I target it at myself or others. It makes me hysterical. When I target it at myself, it makes me s—icidal. In this state I get REALLY sensitive to sounds. It makes me twich, cry, have angry outbursts. I have to run away in this state and I do.

When I target it at others, it turns me into “revenge” mode, where I automatically commit bad stuff. Threat, stalk. BUT: during these events, I lose all my feelings at one point, and really focus by myself. I have 0 feelings, and turn “cold”. - This only happens with people whom I had a romantic failure with

The common stuff in these is they switch off suddenly. Like some episode of some sort.

One time I had a suicidal episode, I was on the streets, and suddenly my urge just ended. And it was like if NOTHING happened.

All the time when I have these extremes, it’s like these NOTHING HAPPENED state after.

I know this is some kind of dissociation. I want to bring this up to my therapist.

Do you have this?

Hey, I will be vulnerable with this post….

Often times when I am mad at someone, it gets to a point where I dissociate and become fucking cruel…

At one point I dont feel anything. I just do stuff automatically. It’s like it turns into an obsessive-compulsive stuff, but without feelings…

I always do this with people I know I am angry with - well, that’s the underlying issue

In the past I blocked out the stuff I did. I burried it deep.

Now in the present I am more conscious, but I still do not feel much in this state

I acknowledge this part in myself now. I even named it.

This dissociative part is with me for some time by now…

Is this a legit thing? Am I just lying to not take accountability for doing shit? Am I having serious internal problems?