u/eating_cement_1984

I was eight.

I looked into the pond. It was murky and I swear,

It wanted to drag me in and drown me.

Now?

I'm twenty.

The water, still quite filthy, is flowing.

The murk is lifting.

But it's too little, too late.

Oh well, good enough to

Quench my thirst, and

After the drought, I'll take what I can get...

The impossible has happened today. Black clouds have lifted somewhat. Some storms have stopped abruptly, some are on the verge of fading away.

Today my mother apologized for the abuse she put me through from back in the day. I had a terrible semester because of the trauma. It was only this sem that I could freely think and feel sad for every single piece of physical, mental, emotional and verbal abuse my 6-12 year old self was put through.

She held both my hands and sincerely said she wants to beg for my forgiveness. She also said she'd reduce her irritating behavior. She seems to understand finally how depressed I've been throughout this tiresome stretch of my life, even if she started with, "so many people beat their kids with belts..." Ultimately, she agreed that it was not right, is not right, and I feel free.

I promised her a couple things. She spilled some secrets on why nobody in the family is our friend. I admitted I don't hate either her or Appa, but fuck, when they do things that get on my nerve, it hurts my brain till I have no choice but to hit the wall with my fist. Perhaps change can happen. Still too early to tell, but I'm willing to change if she is. We hugged it out, my Amma and I. We'll fix this up.

Things actually might get better. Sem 3 starts in a month, I have high hopes for being able to study well this sem, do some extracurriculars, meet new people, all that. It's been a long time since I felt genuine hope... A fragile hope, but hope anyway.

She calls her lawyer: "This coffee my husband made is so bad it's a crime." The lawyer replies "Bring out the coffee dregs, please..." She does as told. "What you have in you hand, ma'am," the lawyer continues, "is "grounds for divorce".

She calls her lawyer: "This coffee my husband made is so bad it's a crime." The lawyer replies "Bring out the coffee dregs, please..." She does as told. "What you have in you hand, ma'am," the lawyer continues, "is "grounds for divorce".