u/mouse_asparagus

(I do not have any other accounts)

~ purring constantly

A can of tuna daily

Happy to relax :3~

Did anyone else's mom lie about her entire life to you? My mom is not diagnosed but she fits all the criteria. Please let me know if this post is not allowed

My mom lied to me about how she met my dad

She lied about how she spent her 20s and 30s

She lied about her religion when I was young enough to not recognize the cognition dissonance she was forcing me to have between her beliefs and actions

She lied about the miscarriage that happened after I was born

She lied about being Mormon then Christian

She lied about cheating on my dad with multiple men (and possibly women)

She gaslights too, still to this day. Now that she's 70 I think apart of her gaslighting is her only way to keep functioning because accountability would destroy her.

She also lied about having Alzheimer's -like symptoms at the moment... If I bring up her signs of aging she gets defensive, shuts down, and won't talk to me

She HATED when people brought up her age or called her ma'am. She had me at 44. My whole childhood was her crying in the car after a cashier called her ma'am.

I found a photo of her and my dad with my oldest sister when she was born and she only responded on the live call with "how did you find that."

So yeah. Was anyone else's mom a constant liar for no clear reason? Extremely secretive.

She also got a lot of piercings and tattoos as she got into her mid to late 50s. She would leave my sister and I at the library, sometimes for 6+ hours, while she went to the "gym" aka cheated on my dad

I can go from hating someone for how they mistreat me to being empathetic, understanding and wanting to be their friend in the span of a few hours before and after meds.

I hate myself. I'm so defective and unstable.

I have alopecia only on my head and it is diffuse but possibly incognito. The steroid shots are not helping and neither is minoxodil or dutasteride for the past three months. I'd love any thoughts on Olumiant

I've given up on dating

I am not religious but it sometimes feels like he was a demon (narcex)

He just exists to mooch, waste other's time and resources, lie, cheat, triangulate, abuse, gaslight, just like a spawn of Satan

The only thing he didn't do was physically hit me

I wish he had so I could have some temporary that would heal and I could show to others

I would still be lifting 4-5 times a week and zone 2 cardio every day of the week. Is an 800 calorie deficit too much? I'm 145.2 lbs 5'7 26F

This is the last 7 day average (not including today) is 2,850 and my fasted weight each morning after using the washroom has remained the same down to the 145.2 lbs 1/5 lb

I need to cut back and stop eating late and I should start losing weight at 2,200 calories a day moving forward

Let's see how it goes!

One of the most obvious and early domestic violence signs I didn't pick up on from my ex boyfriend were how he tried to stop me from getting gender affirming care through my insurance beyond just hormones. He hated that I went through with the surgeries despite his input (how ridiculous that he thought he had any say over my bodily autonomy)

He also hated when I switched from oral estrogen to injections because of his "needle fear" and would make a scene when I injected in front of him

I have autism and he groomed me when I was a teenager and then when I became an adult I moved in. So that is why I stayed with a man who unsuccessfully tried to deter my transition. Learn from my mistake.

I have substance induced bipolar diagnosed

But do I have type 1 in this case?

I remember a year ago at this time I didn't hear voices. I just had a split in my brain of a harsh voice that helped me get my adult responsibilities done through self torment basically and degrading myself internally. I don't know what that was

I'm 26 and I am a straight trans woman, meaning I'm attracted to men. Before THC, SSRIS and AP caused hypomania which ruined my life I had a normal libido.

That is all. I don't know if I should be neutral or sad about it. Now that I have my mania under control I have no desire to do anything romantic physically or put myself at risk with dating. I'm not trying to make this emotional, just observing.

I do feel as though the max dosages of Lexapro, then Zoloft, then duloxotine combined with Abilify and then lamotrogine (two AP at the same time) have really really caused me permanent and irreparable harm mentally, physically, and to my nerve endings too.

TMI but I got electrolysis on my chest a few days ago and barely felt it or flinched. My electrologist thought I wouldn't be able to last 15 minutes cause it was my first appointment but I did the full hour to get rid of the peach fuzz. Lol I just don't feel pain anymore after the APs especially.

Autistic men will sometimes weapnize the fact they're autistic as an excuse to never be interested in (especially women's) other perspectives, new hobbies, empathy or even sympathy

As an autistic woman I've never done that and used this as a way to mistreat others.

I have 13,000 at 17% interest on one card

I could get approved for 18 or 21 month 0% balance transfer

Should I do that now or continue to build my emergency fund?

I only have $1,100 in my emergency fund

I work full-time and work as much overtime as I can, 51k a year before any taxes, but I only end up with like $700 deposits weekly after all my deductions

I don't have a car right now and I don't have any other debts

My main bill is housing, $900, which includes all utilities, and about $400 on food every month. But I have to eat healthy because I'm bipolar and it gets so much worse with a bad diet. Lastly, I end up spending a lot on doctor appointment copays as they add up.

26 male to female transsexual

My hair loss biopsy said it was due to alopecia areata diffuse and my follicle had bacteria.

So now I use the prescription shampoo 1% ciclopirox, get the alopecia steroid injections all over my scalp, oral minoxodil for 3 months and I just restarted topical minoxodil too, and I think it is causing a new shed

I do not have bald patches, it is just so much shedding. I used to have so much hair and it just sheds but seemingly doesn't grow back and now it is so thin

My dermatologist used her microscope and said I have very fine regrowth, but not as much as she'd expect

I've had four major surgeries including sex change, so no longer creating traditional testosterone. However, still on .5 dutasteride and taking saw palmetto too which is probably overkill. Unsure if anesthesia and bodily trauma contributed to hair loss

I started spirolactone when I was 14 and never stopped until I had my testosterone gonads removed, so the hair loss is less likely to be hormone related but not impossible

I had hypothyroidism as a teenager but I got it back to healthy without meds as an adult. I eat well and get at least 10k steps a day and weight train and always hit my protein goal

I have also been anemic before but my iron levels are relatively normal now

I used to take antidepressants which also might have contributed

Lastly, I have breast implants and maybe they are causing the autoimmunity of alopecia.. I am looking into this with a doctor currently

To conclude, I have no idea what else I should try or do. Is there any chance I should start spiro again? Would that block DHT? I don't even think I'm creating DHT but spiro worked when I was a teenager. Do I sound like a non responder?

SSRIs really ruined my life and all of the work I've done, working full-time since 18, feels like it was for nothing

I'm still in debt and I'm renting a room with roommates who are strangers

I had to rehome my dogs and I was betrayed by someone who I thought was my best friend in addition to that

I was able to sell my house and break even on that huge loan

But I don't even have a car in my new city and I have to take the bus. It's humiliating to be a woman that people find concentionally attractive taking public transit. But I know that's American car propaganda at work

Idk, I just feel like there's no way out because of the debt and it's so depressing

I was not allowed to have friends in that domestic violence relationship, so I don't know how to make them as an adult and I have level 1 autism diagnosed too.