u/fancypantsmiss

The thing about love
That transpires lifetimes
Is that after you die
You forget who you were
You forget the shape of the face you loved
But the feeling?
That remains
And when you meet them again
In a new life
With a new face
You don’t know them
You have never met them
But you instantly feel them to be familiar
And at that moment you know
They are either going to be the love of your life
Or one of the biggest lessons this life time

I stand before the mirror this morning, looking for a face I recognize, and I tell myself it’s simple: I just need something to wear for the Fourth. But my closet has turned into a row of things that don’t fit anymore, and there’s nothing simple about that at all.

So my husband drives me to the store, and I try on dress after dress, watching myself disappear a little more with each one. By the last dress, I’m crying in the fitting room, and I just want to go home. He doesn’t argue. He just drives.

Back at home, one dress feels almost right, loose enough to hide in, and for a second I think maybe this is it. Then my mind cuts in, already unkind: how will you breastfeed baby in that? My husband tells me I look like a million dollars, and I know he means it, and I also know it’s what he’s supposed to say. Both things can be true at once.

So I end up back where I started, no outfit and no fix, just this body I don’t recognize yet. I’m not going to pretend there’s a lesson in this. No silver lining, no “you grew a human.” It just sucks feeling this way. And that’s all I have to say.

I mean. Come on!

Context: a friend of ours got caught cheating by his wife. His teenage daughter decided to cut ties with him because of it and wife filed for divorce.

He didn’t mind any of the above and wanted to live in with his affair partner but she ended up reconciling with her husband.

So now he is left with nobody. Alone. And sad.

The whole time I was listening to the story I had the “brother ewww” face. I was experiencing 2nd hand embarrassment for this guy.

I can barely count on my fingers where I made rash stupid decisions like this in my life and this includes my teenage underdeveloped frontal lobe age. No drugs. Not getting high. No casual sex. I was an ideal child for my parents. Yeah I was stubborn and had a temper but otherwise parents would ask if I was coming so that I could “keep the group in line”. I was somewhat of a narc and didn’t mind being one because I’d rather be a narc than be caught doing shit like this. I mean yeah, I have gotten angry or lost temper but never made rash decisions. I do not feel like I have “not lived my life” because I don’t think I would call that living life.

My husband thinks I am extremely judgy and look down on people who do stuff like this and I am like “obviously, I would be embarrassed if I get caught doing something like this that I’d rather die than face people”. Is this a Taurus thing? (Taurus sun and stellium) or is it my Cap moon talking ?

I grew up Hindu, which is a deeply ritualistic religion. But it’s also thousands of years old, so a lot of the original symbolism behind the rituals has gotten lost over generations. What’s left often felt mechanical, going through motions whose meaning nobody could explain to me anymore.

My religion is flexible enough that it let me drift toward something simpler: trusting and surrendering to one higher power, and letting go of a lot of the “rules.” I’m a theist, but not someone who needs every belief locked down or unquestioned. I also won’t dismiss science to hold onto a belief.

I got curious about witchcraft because I’m intuitive and do think there’s something, call it magic, call it whatever, running under the surface of things. But the deeper I went, the more I noticed the same pattern as my upbringing: a lot of emphasis on doing the ritual correctly, not much on the person doing it or why.

Finding this sub has been a relief. I’m not atheist or agnostic, but I also can’t operate on blind faith or unfalsifiable claims. I’ve mostly felt like I don’t fit cleanly into any one box, too skeptical for traditional spaces, too believing for skeptic spaces. Curious if others here came from a strict ritual tradition and ended up somewhere similarly in-between.

I have a really sweet, extremely empathetic and kind 5 year old. It is literally something that people notice in her. It is beautiful watching her grow but as a mother, I do want to protect my sweet child’s heart.

I want her to keep that empathy but also know how to set that boundaries. Any suggestions?

She is a Taurus sun, Tarus rising.