u/NightRunnerAfterDusk

I just graduated from school, and I am ready to go onto the next stage of life. At least this readiness is something I strive to mirror through others as I know other people probably are. But deep within I feel so sad and empty at the same time. Sad that I have met so many great people on the way, and now I would probably never see them face-to-face. Probably some would change contacts to start a new life, so I would not even talk to them anymore. Empty that I don't know how to feel about this period. I am currently putting my hope on a waitlist for uni at a full scholarship, and also start a new life for myself. I know that I will meet new people, but this transition period is honestly excruciating.

I felt like I had disconnected from those I loved for months now, which added onto the anxiety of no one supporting me through my graduation(honestly it was my fault for going no-contact to preserve my mental strength). I cried so much when I saw that message that they are following through the proceedings, showing that they still care for me. Those feelings poured out through sobbing inconsolably for people who have been kind to host me and helped me in every way, great or small.

So back to the question: What next? It's supposed to be summer. I am supposed to frolic in the sun, and enjoy my final days at home before I move onto a new place. But I am too anxious to celebrate. I have been too anxious for the past few months, that I am alone again. Not alone, like having a close circle of friends, but fully alone emotionally. I have always have to eat my feelings since I believe no one can understand me as much as myself - even if they help with good intentions - and I don't know how much further I can go on this way. I have always have to shrink myself to fit in with my peers, even when closer people really celebrate my successes. I don't know how I can manage a perpetual state of anxiety through a transition stage that delays my changes at adapting to a new environment.

I just learnt that in some countries like Australia, votes of the least voted person are transferred onto the winning candidates in the next round. Now I even suppose that there are more to elections than the dual party systems and the one I just was introduced to. The problem is that videos that should be elaborating on such systems complicate the processes so much that it is so difficult to understand why each are distinct in their own way.

I'll start: Improving my typing speed in the two years that I have taught myself to type while facing the screen. I've grown to appreciate that it's something I can be proud for without needing external validation I once sought.

By analysis, I don't mean the obvious things like which team wins within a match, but deeper things like formations and the probability of the team winning a football season. And generally what makes fans loyal towards a specific team even when they lose out on so many seasons (*cough* Arsenal *cough*)?

Also, how is it that such parameters are understood by even child football fans?

I have always wanted to learn how to produce music for myself from a young age, but I never had the resources to learn until very recently, when I got a keyboard but now I don't have the time to start learning it for 5 or so years. So I figured that I should as well try my hand at music production.

I want to use software that can allow me to practice and produce full pieces while I learn. At the same time, I am looking into inexpensive(or even better if free) options. What do you guys suggest?

Matthew 5:45

>that you may be children of your Father in heaven. He causes his sun to rise on the evil and the good, and sends rain on the righteous and the unrighteous.

And before you get up in arms because of context, well... the excerpt from which the verse is picked is about loving your enemies and praying for those who persecute you. But then doesn't this particular verse highlight the quality of impartiality in God.

I wanted to speak about this because, why pray then if even the unjust get an equal treatment to the just? Specifically, why pray for providence if it appears to be destined that a certain thing will happen in your life that falls according to the purpose ordained for you by God?

I wanted to speak about this because, why pray then if even the unjust get an equal treatment to the just? Specifically, why pray for providence if it appears to be destined that a certain thing will happen in your life that falls according to the purpose ordained for you by God?

Matthew 5:45

>that you may be children of your Father in heaven. He causes his sun to rise on the evil and the good, and sends rain on the righteous and the unrighteous.

And before you get up in arms because of context, well... the excerpt from which the verse is picked is about loving your enemies and praying for those who persecute you. But then doesn't this particular verse highlight the quality of impartiality in God.

I wanted to speak about this because, why pray then if even the unjust get an equal treatment to the just? Specifically, why pray for providence if it appears to be destined that a certain thing will happen in your life that falls according to the purpose ordained for you by God?

It's just a thought-provoking question that I came up with as I realized that time-blindness could possibly contribute to that. The time-blindness in question refers to a magnified perception that the things currently beyond our control would always be beyond our control; like if it were to be depicted on a pie-chart, the later would be very small and diluted within the larger now fraction.

So in my hypothesis, I figured that for some individuals, especially those born in households where there may have not been a consistent supply of resources; they developed a scarcity mindset where they learnt to harbour things that they hold sentimental value to. And it seems plausible, at least to me, that time-blindness would magnify this effect, where you find someone has a very niche collection of items they never even use. Or sometimes they may not physically store something, but always enjoy it as if it is the last time they would get the opportunity to have the item/experience.

I read this book, At Night All Blood is Black by David Diop, where there was a certain story(the sorcerer and the fickle princess) that was implied to be narrated by a griot. You probably recognize this persona from the more famous movie: Sinners, by Ryan Cooglers. Being the inquisitive self I am, I took a deep-dive on the spiritual and cultural significance of the griot across West African cultural narratives. So now I need to hear more on the anecdotal side of what tales you heard about the griot growing up, particularly for generations that didn't have direct access to communal practices; or a first-hand experience of what you experienced with the griot.

Additionally, I also want to know whether similar spiritual figures in other Afro-Caribbean cultures also stem from storytelling roles, and a personal inference you could make from what you experienced/what you were taught.

The context in which this question was derived is specific, but I believe it extrapolates to every situation. So I watched a video on how some women have a crush on the pastor when he treats them with respect, and give them the attention they feel they otherwise miss in their personal lives.

I understand that people long for a sense of connection, and are probably used to being treated badly, so any basic form of kindness is treated like an affection that they feel they should pursue. But then what is the psychology of it all? Maybe the metacognitive factors that contribute towards this phenomenon?

The context in which this question was derived is specific, but I believe it extrapolates to every situation. So I watched a video on how some women have a crush on the pastor when he treats them with respect, and give them the attention they feel they otherwise miss in their personal lives.

I understand that people long for a sense of connection, and are probably used to being treated badly, so any basic form of kindness is treated like an affection that they feel they should pursue. But then what is the psychology of it all? Maybe the metacognitive factors that contribute towards this phenomenon?

We've all been in that situation before. You have an unsettling conviction that something bad is about to happen to everyone about you, or something bad has happened to you; and when you tell anyone they play it off as paranoia. Even more absurd is when you have evidence, and they still don't take it into serious regard because they have been used to safety.

So as the question reads, I need a nuanced perspective on how you guys feel about it, and perhaps what habits over time reinforced your approach to such feelings. Also, how much worse does this feeling get if everyone finds out that what you were saying is true, and that you would have got help?

I'll start: Weddings. Like, kuna hii channel imetokea tu juzi which talks about some struggles that we as they guests often notice but don't think so much about. Inaitwa Kimari Maina, Event Host. Mambo kama bridezilla, weather and even small things like hair and colour coding.

I have more reason to be convinced that tropic responses in plants are mediated by bioelectrical signals within plants and in the soil(aka galvanotropism, or so I'm informed). First of all, I came to learn that bees rely on electrical changes in plant flowers to determine how much of the nectar content the plant possesses; where they change their charge when a bee has been to a flower for a while before reverting to the default positive charge. Additionally, there is a video of a mushroom with electrodes attached from it from a synthesizer pad, where oscillating changes in electric signals have been transmuted to musical notes.

I had to preface this because there was a fairly recent experiment by Stefano in 2010(Mancuso, S. (2010). Stefano Mancuso: The Roots of Plant Intelligence**. TED.**), where he identified that when a plant grows its root towards an impervious obstacle, e.g. rock or plastic, it can change direction way before reaching and otherwise groping around the object until it gets a way through. In another instance of positive geotropism, he then performed a separate experiment where a bean plant was shown to grow towards a vertical rod placed in the same soil as the plant in a very specific way, almost like it gained the sentience to know that the pole was there, rather than projecting its shoot tip aimlessly in the air.

I engaged with some interfaces concerning this hypothesis, and unfortunately it says that it is speculative; so there is no way to know whether it holds up, when it seems very plausible. But I really believe in the principle of water potential, and how it is different in different parts of the plant; and how it also guides us to understanding how electric signals in different parts of the plants.

I may not have the resources, but perhaps someone could share their two cents on this rhetoric.